#Tired and in Transition
As I'm writing this tonight, I am sitting on the couch in my comfiest sweat pants and high school hoodie. I am exhausted from more reasons than I can name, but I will tell you this, whether your in your Saturn Return like me, building a new career, helping a spouse with their new life changes, or if your just doing everything you should and are just tired, I feel you friend. It is not even 6:00PM and I've come home from my first Skydiving experience with Kalib and I am exhausted. Transitions aren't really talked about or glamorized. Why? Because they suck, they suck hard. Everyone always wants to post about the end results or the before and after, but the real progress, grit and discipline of a person is found in the transition.
I've found myself in the place where I am smack in the middle of making major life changes. I am "planting the seeds" of change. I'm working full time still as a teacher, going to school online full time at the Institute for Integrative Nutrition to become a Certified Health Coach, writing my first book AND writing a weekly blog and generating content for social media. I am exhausted. At times, like last week, I just wanted to quit and crawl into a mountain hole and sleep and ignore the amount of hard work and dedication this requires. If I could become Smaug and sit upon my imaginary gold mine I see in my future from my success, that would have been my imaginary dream. I've always been a very disciplined person. If something is a priority for me, then I hold myself to the standard of commitment and diligence. That doesn't change the fact that it's hard, exhausting and takes away time from other things. It isn't easy or nice to know that my husband is sitting downstairs enjoying relaxing time to himself while I am up in our study working on school work. It isn't great knowing that I have to cut back on things in my other career that used to be important to me like mentoring and leadership positions. But, the end goals are too big to not pursue whole-heartedly. The dreams I have must be paid for in sacrifice and self-discipline. It goes without saying that anything worth having, isn't worth having if you didn't earn it.
If you are finding yourself in a similar state of transition with an excited heart but an exhausted body and soul, I understand completely where you are at. Let me tell you, scrolling Instagram isn't going to help you, in fact it is probably making you feel worse looking at the highlight reel of "Success". Here are the things that have helped me.
Get outside. I mean it. Whether it is a walk with your spouse and dog, riding your bike or walking to get the mail instead of driving up next to the box, get outside and move your body. You need to unplug your mind and body from the social media rabbit hole, or the online demands of your job or school. This is vital. I read something once that really changed my perspective on this. "The emails will always be there. The dishes will always need to be washed and the house will always need to be cleaned. It can wait". It CAN wait. You can go on a hike and all the things that were there before you left, will be there waiting for you when you return. The dishes arn't going to blow up on your spouse because they feel overwhelmed, but you might. So do yourself a favor and take a break outside.
Up your self care. This may seem obvious to some of you, but this is always the first thing I let slide away when I get overwhelmed. It is so ironic that self care is the most important priorities we need to have in life, and yet it is always the first priority we let slip or fall away to compensate for other things. Whatever you need to do, this ALWAYS has to be scheduled as a priority. Seriously, I have to schedule reminders in my phone and time in my planner for this, otherwise it won't get done. We will always find a way to fill time in our days with important things or easy time wasters, but this has to be a priority. I challenge you to write down 25 things you can do for self care and to do at least two of these things a week at a minimum. I would love to tell you that I practice self care daily, but that's unrealistic with my lifestyle right now. I hold myself to the scheduling of a minimum of twice a week. For me, my self care is always a bubble bath or time alone. Seriously, I love to sit and read, journal or walk in nature when I'm not sitting and soaking in my tub. I also am really enjoying some time watching shows on Netflix. Whatever floats your boat. Here's some of my list of 25 if you need a little help getting started.
1. Bubble Bath 13. Journaling
2. Listening to music 14. Longer Meditation
3. Walking in nature 15. Cooking a meal at home
4. Aromatherapy 16. Giving myself a massage or going and getting one
6. Cuddling with Kalib
7. Charcoal drawing
11. Go to a coffee shop
12. Calling up my besties for a chat
Create a Must Do List and an Eventually Need to Get To List. Reorganizing your priorities will help lighten the anxiety you feel and to reorganize your priorities. There is a huge difference between something that has a deadline today, vs. needing to "clean the house". One of those things has to get done, and the other can wait to get done. Reprioritizing what needs to be done vs. what can wait will help you see things a little more clearly and just by writing it out and visually be able to reorganize what is causing you unnecessary anxiety.
Ask for help. I mean it. If you have people in your life, ask for support and help. Even if it is as simple as asking your spouse to take on a chore they don't normally do for the week. Ask for help and support. If you are married or in a family, then there is a tribe of people who you support daily and it is time to ask for support in return. I understand those of you who hesitate to ask for help. I have always struggled with the idea that I could "do it all" and that if I asked for help "others wouldn't do it right" or I would appear weak for asking for help. I cannot tell you how WRONG and naive this old notion was. Any successful leader knows how to delegate. So if you have things that are a priority for you right now or this week, delegate and ask for support.
Let me know how some of these things went for you in the comments section or over on my Instagram feed. Happy Monday Folks!